Tallying Up the Weekend

I was kind of scared to log my calories on MFP for the weekend. Not only because I was scared I'd gone way over, but also because I had a lot of different foods and knew it would be a pain in the ass to log every single one of them.

I had the same fear I used to when I was young and didn't have the hang of balancing my checkbook yet. Instead of wondering how screwed I was financially, I sat here and wondered how screwed I was... calorically?

Anyway, I typed and typed and typed away.

The bad news: I was 1100 calories over on Saturday. I already knew that, though.

The good news: I was 400 under on Sunday, 50 under on Monday (ha!), and dead-on yesterday (when I had a tiny binge). Today, I'm 400 under. That means I still need a deficit of 250 calories tomorrow, either through eating less or exercising. That shouldn't be too hard. :)

Monday was pretty hard to tally since I didn't have exact measurements, but I tried very hard to use what I knew of portion sizes when I filled my plate. Knowing I'd have to remember everything for my food log, I took exactly one tablespoon of each side dish and 3 ounces of various meats (3 ounces is the size of a deck of cards). I just had to remember how many tablespoons and how many decks of cards I'd eaten when I logged everything tonight.

All in all, I think I did okay. Even though I didn't get into trouble as far as calories are concerned, my nutrition was CRAP. I could tell just by the way I felt, and it was evident when I wanted to binge my face off yesterday.

Today was detox day. I had a bagel with cream cheese for breakfast, grapes and string cheese for snacks, pork and a salad with almonds for lunch, and chicken with brown rice for dinner. I'm stuffed, even though I'm 400 calories under. I drank about 52 ounces of water during work. I'm starting to feel better already. I don't want to binge, and I don't feel hot and sluggish.

I was kind of worried I'd ruined it when I felt those binge urges yesterday. It's nice to know I can shush the monster in a matter of 24 hours now. I'll just have to be much more careful the next time we go out of town. :-P

Memorial Day Weekend

I am going to be amazed if I lose weight this week. Hell, I'll be amazed if I don't gain weight this week.

I know I said I'd allow myself to enjoy Memorial Day weekend, within some boundaries, without feeling guilty, but I feel the guilt creeping up.

Or maybe that's acid reflux.

Anyway, it started with a potluck at work on Saturday. We had pulled pork, a fruit bowl, and then 82 dishes that were either high-fat or high-calorie. I tried to be careful, but I ended up 1000 calories over my daily budget. I did Turbo Jam, hoping to come up even.

On Sunday, we went to Detroit to visit my cousins. We stopped at Arby's on the way out of town, and I got a roast beef sandwich and apple slices. Okay so far. Then we went to dinner at P.F. Chang's, where I had two lettuce wraps and chicken fried rice. Again, not so bad. No exercise, but I didn't oink out.

Today, I feel like I oinked out.

I had some leftover Chinese food for lunch. Then, we went to my aunt and uncle's house for dinner. I had a couple pieces of cheese, two pepperoni rolls, a couple crackers with roasted red pepper dip, one baby back rib, a couple pieces of skinless chicken breast, cheesey potatoes (one tablespoon), two roasted potato wedges, some carrots, two bites of kielbasa, a cup of mixed fruit, one bite of key lime pie, three bites of lemonade cake, and a tablespoon of chocolate pudding. All in all, it wasn't a BAD day, but I feel like I ate so much food! I haven't eaten like that in ages, and now I feel like I have a food hangover. It was yummy, but I can't wait to get back to soup, salad, fruit, and lean meats. I can't believe I used to eat like that all the time (and my portions were much larger).

I feel like I should walk, but it's 90 degrees outside. Fail. I want to do Turbo Jam, but I still feel sick from eating too much.

I know. Excuses, excuses.

I might grab my iPod and dance. Any movement is better than none, and I don't want to overdo it in this heat. I'm also going to eat very carefully this week and be more disciplined when it comes to exercise. I have to make up for this weekend. I know I said I wouldn't feel guilty, and I don't, but it scared me how close I came to binging while there. When we got home, I wanted to grab more food. I'm not even hungry. I grabbed a huge glass of water instead.

~*~

Other than the boring food report, we had a great time this weekend. We watched "Ice Loves Coco" with my cousin, Kim, while we waited for my cousin, Tom, to get home from work. Brent laughed because we realized Coco is just like me, and Ice T is just like Brent. We definitely have extremely similar relationships! It was pretty funny. I usually don't care for reality television, but the show made me laugh, and it was interesting.

When Tom got home, we went to P.F. Chang's. I'd never been there before, but I'd heard everyone rave about it. Tom really loves their lettuce wraps, so we got some of those. I got a jasmine blackberry iced tea, which sounded delicious, but it tasted like Circus Peanuts. Yuck! Brent tried it to confirm, and said, "Holy cow. This really does taste like Circus Peanuts." The waitress was very nice and gave me a regular iced tea instead. I told her she could charge us for the yucky tea, but it wasn't on our bill.

After P.F. Chang's, we went mini-golfing. That was so much fun! I haven't been mini-golfing in many, many years. Tom and I used to go mini-golfing all the time when we were kids, so it was really cool. He and I ended up in a tie after we tallied our scores. We both got a hole-in-one too! Kim came in third, and then Brent came in last. Awwww. :( I was upset that I'd forgotten my camera. It would have been nice to have some pictures of that. One more check for the "Why I need an iPhone or Droid" list. ;)

When we got home from mini-golfing, we changed into pajamas and watched "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles". I'd forgotten how funny that movie is. I always feel bad for John Candy's character, though, especially because even though he's annoying, he's such a nice guy. He's the master of puppy dog eyes.

We didn't do anything when we got up today. We sat around and watched the Tigers play the Red Sox, and then we put on the Cubs and Padres game. The Cubs ended their 12-game losing streak, thank goodness. Brent was pretty relieved and happy.

After the barbecue at my aunt's house, we drove home. The drive was uneventful; traffic was light, and the weather was fine (just HOT and sunny). We got home around 9:30 and turned the A/C on right away.

I hope you all had a great weekend!

Memorial Day Weekend

First of all, whatever you are doing this weekend, please take a moment to reflect on and thank those brave men and women who served, fought for, and died for our country. They left behind friends and family so that we may enjoy time with our own loved ones in a free country. They made the ultimate sacrifice, and in the midst of clearance sales, barbecues, and sleeping in, the very least we can do is remember why Monday is a holiday. If you are out and about and see a veteran, please take the time to thank them for their service. Hell, give 'em a beer while you're at it.

~*~

Ahh, Memorial Day weekend. I have to work today, but I have Tuesday off to make up for it. I get a three-day weekend, just not on the three days everyone else has off. I may be in the office today, but while you're all back at work, dealing with Tuesday drudgery and playing catch-up, I'll be sleeping in. ;)

I'm not going to go hog wild this weekend (har har), but with an inability to track my calories and an unsureity of when I'll be able to exercise, I've decided to just leave it up to my willpower and current knowledge of what's Good and what's Bad.

I realized I should probably plan as best as I can, though. It would be stupid to avoid my aunt's amazing baking, my uncle's amazing barbecue, and Lafayette's amazing coneys, so I plan to do Turbo Jam tonight. We're having a potluck at work today, and I haven't eaten TOO much food, but I'm not taking any chances!

Anyway, we're leaving for Detroit tomorrow morning, and we'll be spending Sunday afternoon and evening with my cousins. There is talk of mini-golf, which means walking and moving around. I'm okay with this plan. We might walk around Greektown some too.

On Monday, we're going over to my aunt and uncle's house for a barbecue. When we get home Monday night, I can go for a walk or do Turbo Jam again (depending on how much I pig out). ;)

So I think the weekend should be okay, but it is a bit nerve-wracking not being able to have full, complete control of my food, my eating schedule, and my exercise. I've already promised myself I won't get upset if I don't lose any weight this week. If I do, then I can give myself a pat on the back for surviving a holiday weekend relatively unscathed. If not, oh well.

I deserve a fun weekend with my relatives, and if it means not losing two pounds this week, that's okay. It's all about the big picture. It doesn't mean I've fallen off the wagon. It doesn't mean I'm in the middle of a set-back. It's quality time spent with family, and that's really all that matters until I'm home and back into my routine again.

That's the difference between a lifestyle change and a crash diet. My lifestyle has to allow for family, friends, and fun while being smart about my choices; otherwise, I'm not living, and you can't have a lifestyle if you refuse to live.

Friday Weigh-In

This morning's official weigh-in: 341.8 pounds.

I'm down 1.8 pounds from last week, bringing me to an overall loss of 14.2 pounds.

341.8. The 330s are so close I can taste it. I really hope I can knock a couple pounds off this next week and get there. I feel like I've been in the 340s forever. I was up and down quite a bit while starting and stalling this weight loss, so I've been seeing 34_ on the scale for a few months. It's time to kick that stupid number off the scale forever.

A Moment of Zen

I experienced a strange, crazy moment earlier. I'm going to chalk it up to zen.

I never thought I'd reach this point. I hope this sticks around permanently, because I think it means I may have kicked (or at least curbed) my food addiction.

My net calories were around 400-500 yesterday because I didn't eat much and exercised a ton. I just wasn't very hungry. When my friend, Beth, called to ask if I wanted to have lunch and go shopping today, I figured maybe I could have a little treat or cheat day since I was so on-track.

We went to lunch at Chili's. I skipped the steak and ordered an amazing grilled chicken. It was Margarita Grilled Chicken, and it had rice and black beans on the side. According to MFP, it was 550 calories total. Awesome! It was delicious.

After we walked around the mall for a while, Beth suggested we stop at the food court for a drink. I hadn't had diet soda in about three weeks, but I wanted a slice of pizza because it sounded SO good, and I like to have soda with pizza. We went to Sbarro, I got a slice of cheese pizza and a Diet Pepsi, and then we sat down.

I patted the pizza with napkins to get the grease off and then... nothing. I took a couple bites, and I just wasn't feeling it. I didn't want it. I sipped my Diet Pepsi, and it tasted so acidic and sweet to me. Not one to waste food I've paid for, I took a couple more bites, but it just wasn't that good. Beth said I should just toss it - no sense in eating calories I don't want - but I was torn over wasting it. Finally, I tossed it. I simply DID NOT want it. It was like my brain kept refusing to enjoy it. I kept thinking about how far I've come and that the only reason I bought it was because I wanted a treat. I wasn't hungry. I just wanted it.

That was the old Sarah. To sit there, not wanting to eat that pizza, not wanting to eat empty calories I didn't even need, that's the new Sarah.

It was a total eye-opener. Even the pie at the dessert place didn't look appealing. My brain just kept saying, "That's what made you fat. That's poison."

Perhaps that's a bit extreme, and I'm sure I'll be able to enjoy food like that again, but it's nice to have a break from the endless loop of, "EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT MORE EAT MORE EAT MORE MUST EAT MUST EAT MUST EAT". That voice is finally gone.

I hope it's gone forever.

Now, I see nothing wrong with treating myself now and again. A lady at work who makes amazing cupcakes brought some in the other day, and I had one. Why on earth would I deny myself one of the best things I've ever tasted? Instead of having four, though, I had one. The old me would have had several. The new me had one, enjoyed every bite of it, and logged it on MFP so I'd know to make up for it later when I made dinner and exercised.

This is a lifestyle. It is not a diet. It is not temporary. I feel like I've finally turned that corner where habits have become ingrained. I never want to fight that urge to binge again. I hope this is permanent.

Eternal thanks to Beth for being such an inspiration to me. The reason we were shopping today is because that girl has gotten down to a size four. She started at a size 14. I am so proud of her. She's a huge help when it comes to nutrition and motivation. Someday, I hope we can go shopping for new clothes for me. I'm going to be so excited when I can wear Misses sizes again and we can shop at the same stores. She did point out that Old Navy has jeans up to size 18, so maybe that day isn't too far off. :)

Impatient

Okay, so, I know my official weigh-in is supposed to be Friday morning. I know I'm supposed to stay off the scale until then.

I got impatient, though, and decided to weigh myself this morning.

I hit 342 on the nose. I'm down 1.6 pounds since last Friday. It's not as big a loss as I was hoping for, but it's still a loss, and I still have two days before my official weigh-in. If history proves correct, that number will take a dive on Friday. (I've been weighing in heavy mid-week and then it seems to drop way down before Friday morning.)

Part of me wants to worry about it, and this is precisely the reason why they tell you not to weigh yourself every day. Weight, especially in women, can fluctuate so much over an hourly/daily period.

Anyway, even if I stay at 342 on Friday, it's still a loss. It's still less than what I weighed a week ago, two weeks ago, a month ago.

342 is very close to the 330s. I can't wait to get there. Hopefully, I can hit 339 next Friday. That's a very motivating thought. :) Just one more week, and (hopefully) I'll be out of the 340s!

Oh, Geez

The "ha ha" is on me.

I just called Direct Loans to find out why my payment went up over $200/month.

Apparently, when they sent me the notice saying, "We need your 1040 to keep you on this plan," I ignored the notice. Basically, before the notice came in the mail, I went online and re-applied for the same plan. I thought I was being pro-active by doing that. So, when I received my notice, I tossed it since I'd applied already.

If I'd read the notice, however, I would have realized I applied for the wrong plan.

My customer service rep, Dennis, was very nice and explained it happens fairly often since Income-Contingent and Income-Based are so similar. The internal English major in me said, "Yeah, except for the fact they use different words. I should have noticed."

He's going to send me another notice, which I'll reply to this time. He told me to check the box for Income-BASED Repayment. I wrote "IBR" on my notepad and laughed**. No way I can forget that now.

Once I do that, my payments will go from the doomed $347 to $185. Much, much better.

This leaves some wiggle room for braces (no pun intended), but I think I'll still wait until next year when I have the last of my medical bills paid off and I can set up my FSA.

Government: 1
Me: 0


**I do not think IBR is a laughing matter. I am sorry if you suffer from it. It just amuses me that student loans can be associated with digestive issues. How fitting.

Braces: Parte the Third

The government has decided I don't need braces.

Every year, I submit my income so they can figure out my student loan payment. I'm on the income-based plan because it's the easiest for me. My loan payments have always hovered around $120 - $140.

Last night, I got a notice stating my payments are going up to $347.

Um, what?

When I graduated, my interest rate was 2%. During the 2008 bank bail-outs, my interest rate went up to 7%. But I'm not bitter.

I got a promotion in late 2010, which meant my income for tax year 2011 was higher than previous years. It wasn't that much higher, though, and certainly not enough to warrant a $200 increase in my payment.

I plan to call them today to make sure it's correct. The code on the payment plan looked wrong, so I'm hoping it was a miscalculation on their part.

In the meantime, I've canceled my appointment for panoramic x-rays and the "before" pictures taken with the Predator Appliance**. My braces were going to cost $200/month, the exact increase in my student loan payment.

It's as if they knew.

Now, I'm not complaining about paying the loan back. It is a loan, and I knew that when I was in school. I knew I couldn't skate by on it forever. I suppose I'm just miffed that it's such a large increase after becoming accustomed to the payment going up by only $20-40 every year.

Braces aren't totally out of the picture, though. I crunched some numbers last night, and it turns out I'll be able to re-visit the idea in a year or so, once I have another loan paid off. This will also give me time to set up my FSA at work, meaning the money for my braces is taken out pre-taxes.

If the government is going to screw me, I may as well screw them right back.



**Do a Google image search for "before braces". Now do a Google image search for "Predator". See the resemblance? Or just go to my first post about braces.

Wrigley Field

Right now, I have some mini-goals set up. One of those is to get back to 314 pounds, my weight when I met Brent.

There is a very specific reason for this.

Brent and I love the Cubs. We love Chicago. We love Wrigley Field.

Wrigley Field, however, does not love me.

Wrigley Field was built lo those many years ago, when the average person was teeny tiny. The "new" seats, installed in the 1960s, are 18", and you can't raise the armrests. They are unforgiving metal armrests that allow absolutely zero wiggle room. Allowing for the armrests, the seats are 16-17" wide, and you are right on top of your neighbor.

When that first picture was taken, Brent had flown to Chicago to visit me for the first time. It was our second time meeting each other, as I'd flown to Albuquerque to visit him three months prior. We went to Wrigley Field the very next day. The seats were tight, so I sat sort of on the edge of the seat and turned toward him a little, much like I'm sitting in that picture.

When we went back to Wrigley last September, I was 356 pounds. I didn't think anything of it. I figured I'd just sit on the edge of the seat again.

Wrong.

Because I had extra weight in my hips and butt - 42 extra pounds - I couldn't sit as far back as I had during that first game. I had to sit so far forward, my knees were digging into the cup rests on the backs of the seats ahead of us. Plus, it was killing my left knee to sit like that, and it was already in pain from being so heavy. I could barely get up from a sitting position at that weight.

Brent suggested we move down so I could sit in the aisle seat and stretch my leg out. It worked perfectly until the bottom of the sixth inning, when some latecomers came to claim their seats. They told us they thought the game started at 3:00, not 1:00. (Seriously?!?) So, we moved back to our original seats in the middle of the row.

Some girls had just sat down in front of us, and I realized I'd be hovering right above them, creeper-style, since I had to sit so far forward. I didn't want to breathe down their necks for the rest of the game. So, Brent located some aisle seats way back near the top of the deck. I was so upset about everything that I cried through the rest of the game. I felt horrible. Ashamed. You think that would have been the last straw, right?

Obviously not. It took me another six months to get my butt in gear, so to speak.

Which brings us to this post.

My dad has always wanted to go to Wrigley Field. I'm very excited to bring my dad to Wrigley. I know how much he's going to love it. We're going to drink Old Style, eat cheesy pretzel bites and hot dogs, and watch some ball. It's going to be a great summer afternoon with my dad and my boyfriend. I can't wait.

We decided on July 14, as the Arizona Diamondbacks are playing in Chicago that weekend. Kirk Gibson is their manager now, and my dad thought it would be cool to see a former Tiger at Wrigley, especially since we have fond memories of seeing him at Tiger Stadium when I was a kid.

If you have no idea who that is, do you remember this picture from the 1984 World Series? That's "Gibby", after he hit his home run that clinched the World Series for the Tigers.

Anyway, this means I have until July 14 to get back down to 314 pounds. I'm sure the seats will be fine even if I only get to 320, but I know for a fact they'll be fine if I get down to 314. I'm 343 as of a quick weigh-in this morning, so that means I have seven weeks and five days to lose 29 pounds. That's an average of 3.7 pounds per week. Right now, I'm losing about 2.6 pounds per week, so I would have to increase my exercise by a few hours per week. Getting to 320 would be the more attainable (and safe) goal, of course. At my current pace, I'll be around 323 that day, so if I step it up, I could easily see 320 or a bit less.

Either way, whether it's 314, 320, or 323, I'm going to be in much better condition than I was when I weighed 356 pounds and had a tendonitis in both knees and plantar fasciitis in my left foot.

Just like the Cubs, I need to step up my game.

Speed Reading

I started reading when I was just shy of three years old. I picked it up immediately and never had any learning issues. My vocabulary and spelling skills expanded just as rapidly. When I started kindergarten, I was bored out of my mind. My teacher - and I'll always love her for this - decided to test me instead of dismissing me as some kid with ADD. I'm so glad I started school before doctors started drugging children.

Anyway.

After administering some tests, which I honestly don't remember, she determined I could read and spell at the fifth grade level. No wonder I was bored!

My parents told me I could start in the first grade right away. I'd only been in kindergarten for three weeks. I liked it because it was fun, but it really did seem baby-ish. I clearly remember being bored out of my mind when she had all of us come up, in order, to use the pointer and point at all of the differently-colored elephants around the room. When you pointed at an elephant, you had to state which color it was. Many of the kids struggled, but some did okay. I was sick and tired of waiting for my turn. This was so easy! Finally, she handed me the pointer, and (probably to prove a point) I ran all around the perimeter of the room yelling, "Orange! Red! Yellow! Green! Blue! Purple! Black! Grey! Brown! White!" while I slapped the pointer on each elephant.

That was kindergarten to me. Endless days of waiting for everyone to figure it out and wishing we could MOVE ON.

Moving to the first grade had its pros and cons. I was finally learning new things, and I felt like I was on an even keel with my classmates. Unfortunately, the teacher kept making a huge deal about how smart I was and said things like, "Did you hear Sarah read that? That's how I want all of you to read. Catch up!" The fact she was a 132-year old nun probably didn't help matters. Nuns don't have filters. I won every classroom spelling bee, and (as you can imagine) all of the kids hated me. I had very few friends. I started losing spelling bees on purpose, just so they wouldn't tease me anymore. I tried to blend into the background as much as possible. I stopped raising my hand.

Fast forward a couple years. Now I'm into paperbacks, and I'm finishing them at lightning speed. My dad kept saying, "How can you even enjoy the story? Do you even remember anything? Slow down and enjoy the book." It was more out of disbelief than criticism. My dad was very proud of me; in fact, he's the one who taught me how to read. We used to go to the library all the time when I first started reading, and he made a game out of reading words backwards. I thought it was just fun and silly, but he was actually teaching me how to sound things out rather than memorizing the way words look.

This continued into adulthood. I still finish books at a breakneck pace. Sometimes, I wish I didn't. I'd love to savor a book for a few days. I'm always so sad when I look forward to getting a new book, only to have it finished in a few hours.

I found this test on someone's Facebook today. I scored 1257 words per minute.

How did you do?

Source: Staples eReader Department

New House

I am so excited.

We move into our new house in six weeks.

SIX WEEKS

It's actually more of a duplex, since it's the entire top level of a huge historic home, but I think of it as a house because we have front and rear entrances, and it's 1700 square feet. (It's bigger than some of my friends' houses.)

Things that are squee-worthy:

- The square footage
- Formal dining room (it's big enough for roller skating)
- Fireplace in the living room
- Brent will have an office
- Normal size refrigerator/freezer, which means I can finally cook for real
- Basement w/ storage and laundry
- Two-car garage
- Two porches
- Winding staircase in the front; servents' staircase in the back (original to the house - our
bedroom is off that staircase, and it used to be the maid's room)
- House was built in 1853
- Instead of overhead lights in each room, we have electric candalabras on the wall. The dining room has a chandelier in the same style.
- BIG windows
- Radiators for heat = low heating bill
- No more yetis above us
- No more noisy neighbor next to us (he wakes us up with a lawn mower, leaf blower, edge
trimmer, and whatnot almost every day)
- No more noisy neighbors coming in and out at all hours
- Youngstown style kitchen sink (the picture below is an example)

Weekly Weigh-In

This is a Thai highway sign. I think it looks cool.

Woohoo! The scale was being finicky all week, to the point I actually panicked last night and called it a "dirty, lying whore", but it came through for me today.

I ended up weighing myself five times because I simply couldn't believe it. I'm down 2.8 pounds from last week, to 343.6, putting me at a two-week total of 5.4 pounds and an overall total of 12.4 pounds.

I need to start measuring inches too, since I can tell my clothes are fitting a lot better. My jeans need a belt, and they're a bit baggy in the thighs. I still can't get into the next size, though, so I'll try again in a few weeks.

Seeing that number drop to 343.6 after being "stuck" around 346 all week gave me a huge confidence boost. If I can lose just a teeny bit more during this next week, I'll hit 340. That's SO close to the 330s I can taste it. I can't wait to get into the 330s because then my first mini-goal will be within reach (331 = 25 pounds lost).

Yay! :)

Thintopia

This is our group image. Isn't he smexy?

I joined a Thintopia competition with some other ladies. I was a bit nervous, since I haven't really been tracking my progress as I get accustomed to the calorie-counting and exercising. I could feel changes in my body, but I didn't think my weight had changed all that much since that last drop over the winter.

The weigh-in day is Friday, so I weighed myself last Friday, and I was 349 pounds (down from 356 on January 18). When I weighed myself this Friday, I was pretty nervous. I wasn't sure if I'd see much of a change within a week, especially because, at this weight, it's hard to tell.

My weight was 346. I lost three pounds! It feels like a drop in the bucket, but I'll take every pound I can get. Soon, it will be three more pounds, then three more, then three more... And this past week wasn't hard at all. I was pretty casual about my eating instead of overly-careful, and I rested one night instead of exercising. If I really stepped up my game, I bet I could lose more, but part of me wants to stay in that 3 pound/week range so I don't get too much loose skin.

I know I need to bring my sodium down. I drink a lot of water, but I could stand to cut the sodium even more and drink more water and green tea. Sometimes I wonder if I'd lose a bit more if I didn't retain so much water. My feet are puffy more often than not, and my rings are usually tight. I don't like salt, so I don't eat salty foods, but I'm sure I eat a lot of things that contain not-obvious sodium (soups and whatnot). Now that I have the hang of the calories and exercise, it's time to focus on sodium.

It will be interesting to see next Friday's weigh-in. Doing the competition gives me accountability beyond my normal amount of, "I want to buy new jeans." Seeing my name near the top of the list would be awesome. It's my version of pushing myself harder so the person on the treadmill next to me doesn't think I'm a wuss. ;)

Also, my size 24 jeans are getting really loose in the waist. I find myself yanking them up all the time. I decided to go to Lane Bryant to see if I could put on the 22s. I was positive I couldn't, since there is NO WAY I'm a 22 yet, but I wanted to see how far they'd go.

I managed to get them on, but they wouldn't button, just like I thought. I pushed and pushed and sucked in my tummy, but there was still a three-inch gap between the button and the buttonhole. Ha! :) It was pretty funny. Anyway, even though I couldn't fasten them, which I didn't expect anyway, it was nice to see that I could get them on and that I could probably fasten them in another couple months. I thought about buying them so I could keep trying them every week (and note my progress), but LB jeans are too expensive to buy on a whim like that.

Braces: Parte the Second

My consultation for braces went very well. I love this orthodontist (Dr. Sage).

She felt around in my mouth for a bit and had me move my jaw. She introduced me to a bunch of new terms. I was pretty nervous at first because I wasn't sure what we'd need to do, but it only took her a few minutes to let me know the game plan.

I can't use Invisalign because my teeth are too crowded; however, I do not have to have my jaw broken (my main concern). So that's cool. Also, since I'm an adult, we won't be using headgear or an expander. Once you're an adult, your bones are fused, so those appliances simply do not work. I do have to have 2-4 molars extracted; she'll know for sure once she does x-rays.

I'll have to wear regular braces for at least two years. She told me adults can sometimes take a bit longer because our teeth are stubborn, unlike a child or teenager who's in the process of growing. She can give me ceramic brackets on my front, top teeth, but then the rest are metal. It's only $300 extra, so I'm going for that.

I am not this cute, but you get the idea.

The total cost is $5600. I think my insurance might cover $1000 of it, but we're both calling to check since their terms were a bit ambiguous. She recommended we both call so that if we get two different answers we can ask for more clarification. Smart lady. :)

My next appointment is May 23rd. At that appointment, she'll take panoramic x-rays and do some other things I can't remember. I think she needs to take molds, but I can't remember if that's before or after I have my extractions. Once that's all said and done and my extractions are complete, she can put on the spacers and then set me up with the actual braces.

I'm excited and nervous at the same time. My job involves a lot of phone work, but she said I shouldn't have a lisp since I won't have an expander or headgear. She did mention I might have some raw cheeks and lips for a couple of weeks until my mouth gets used to the braces, but she's going to give me some dental wax to cover any bad areas until I develop thicker skin in those areas. I may take a couple days off work to give myself time to get used to them instead of jumping into taking forty calls per day and shredding my mouth to bits.

Brent offered to help me pay for them, which was really sweet, but I don't want to take money out of his savings account. I have a flexible spending plan at work, so I'll just stick it to the feds and use that instead. ;)

Second Turbo Jam Workout

I had to skip my workout last night since our DVD player died. I got it in 2007, and it saw lots and lots of use and a few moves, so I'm surprised it lasted this long.

I went to Target and picked up a new one. By the time I got home and hooked it up, it was 11:00. I really wasn't in the mood to do something high-impact, but I didn't want to skip exercise altogether, so I went for a walk around the neighborhood since it was cool and almost-rainy. I ended up burning 438 calories, so it wasn't a total waste.

Tonight, I did Turbo Jam Cardio Party for the second time. I burned 1087 calories, just a hair over what I burned the first time. Holy cow!!! That included a water break and a couple of "fudging it" portions where I simply could not keep up with her. I know I'm only burning that many because I weigh so much, but whatever. I'll take it. Now I know why super obese people lose so much weight at first.

Anyway, I was in a crappy mood when I started the DVD, and I had to fight my bad mood all the way through. I wanted to stop and lay on my bed (since it was right there), but I made myself keep going because I have to. I just kept picturing all of the inspirational things I've saved on Pinterest. Plus, I hoped the music and movement would help my mood. Nope. :( Unfortunately, I just kept mulling everything over to the beat of the music. It's been a rough week.

Luckily, I have tomorrow "sort of" off. I say "sort of" because I have to go into work for two hours to make up some time.

I'm going to have lunch with my friend, Beth, and she's going to give me some moving boxes left over from her sister-in-law's move. Then I'm going to head into work from 1:30 - 3:30. I have an orthodontist appointment at 4:00, and it's on that end of town, so I chose those hours for a reason. Everything's going to think I'm nuts when I show up for two hours in the afternoon.

I'm excited about the orthodontist appointment. I thought it would take forever to get here, but now it's here! I really hope she proposes a treatment plan I can afford and live with. It would be nice to have straight teeth and a decent pants size in two years.

Anyway, between lunch with Beth and being proactive about getting my teeth fixed, tomorrow should be a much better day. Even with lunch, work, and the appointment, I should still have a couple hours to myself before Brent gets home from work. I cherish those hours alone because we're crammed into this tiny apartment and have absolutely zero space of our own. We move to the bigger place in 7.5 weeks. We can't wait!

Turbo Jam

I just did my first Turbo Jam workout. It's a two-disc set with five workouts. I chose "Cardio Dance" for my first, after I did the "Learn" chapter (where she runs through the basic moves). It was pretty easy to pick up, since I did a lot of Tae-Bo and hip-hop in the past, but I can see where it might move verrrrryyyyy quickly for beginners. I highly suggest going through the "Learn" chapter and some of the slower workouts first, especially because Chalene could use a little work with her timing.

The music was a remix of some popular early 90s music, so I kept laughing. It was fun working out to that stuff again.

I liked that two of her dancers did low-impact versions of the moves. If you have joint issues, you can watch them and follow what they do.

I wore my Timex heart rate monitor for the first time. It took me a little while to figure out how to get my calorie total, but once I did, I was shocked. The workout was 43 minutes long, and I burned 1053 calories! Wow! It was such a fun, quick workout that I didn't feel like I was moving that much. I'm definitely going to make this my daily workout, with some Firm Upper Body tossed in for weight training since I need to get my arms toned and prevent as little loose skin as possible. I want these bingo wings GONE once I get to my goal weight.

I'm so happy I purchased this. I'm definitely going to spoil myself and get her Turbo Fire set as soon as I have some extra cash. Turbo Fire is newer and has newer dance remixes; plus, it's a lot of the same moves, and her cues are better. I might keep doing Turbo Jam until I'm comfortable with the impact, though, as I've heard Turbo Fire is like Turbo Jam on crack.